Melisa's Reviews

Skit TV, The Litterbug, Hello, the world is a funny place to beWestside Vs. Crypts

Skit TV Review
Directed by: Tim Ellis
Movie type: COMEDY

I think people will agree when I say that true excellence has been produced here by Tim. Skit T.V is the funniest thing I've seen since sliced potatoes, although the gags and extremely weird voices that came from Tim's mouth in Aliens from Space were slightly better. I also liked the end credits where Slam's biscuits and pants were appreciated. The best part of the film was the true to life explanation of constipation .........this part was very funny and I nearly died laughing (literally).

The hand made scenes were of a good standard and I liked the life like replica of a white toilet ......shere brilliance I think. Although this was not as funny as AFS it was still very good. I also thought the GREY POOP ON mustard bit was extremely funny ....especially the bit where the Action Joe look-a-like throws it at him and the other guy makes a funny sounding noise. Another funny part, (may not seem that funny to others) was the bit after BATHROOM HORRORS was introduced where all those people suddenly appeared and emitted a loud scream from their mouths, shortly followed by the sound of Tim's dad laughing (correct me if I'm wrong Tim). Also Tim's interpretation of his dad was very funny, if my dad spoke like that in real life I think I'd laugh in his face all day (no offense to your dad Tim, but it's very funny).

The sideshows weren't all that entertaining although I did enjoy the cannon ball one, even Slam appeared in it, but as a death crazed Andrew Neilson hater, un-willing to clean up the blood left by his unlawful killing of Andy, (maybe not so much death crazed, more like biscuits and pants crazed).

Some parts were not as funny as others, like the bit with Bongo at the beginning, that wasn't too funny. The sound track was good but I think he should have used that band that came to his church, I think they would have added to the originality of the film, if you see what I mean.

Overall, this film was really funny and I look forward to the next film created by him. I would give this film a 4. Good work my friend.

Overall Verdict    

The Litterbug
Directed by: Jimmy Pozin
Movie type: ACTION

In the past, Jimmy Pozin hasn't been the most likable of characters. Constant stupid activities usually associated with him haven't given our Jimmy the greatest of reputations. However, the shear brilliance that has been produced by him may put him in a different light. When OZ first told me about Jim's film, I thought that it would either be badly directed or just plain boring, like most of the films that are around nowadays, I was pretty reluctant to watch it, but I was taken aback when I saw the brilliant scenes that had been created by someone who I thought was a right retard, well, maybe he still is.

Although the story line lacked originality (nearly every action film after AJ2 contained multiple killings and no story line what so ever) it was still quite amusing to see the commotion that was caused by someone carelessly dropping litter. The sound quality was good but the Prodigy music in the opening credits lasted too long.

I think that this could have been a rival for AJ2 if the story line was more appealing to viewers that want less killing and more comedy even though, to me, mass murder over a piece of litter is pretty funny in a twisted kind of way.

However, Litterbug has by far beaten the special effects that were in AJ2. I'm not saying Jason's effects were crap, but AJ2 is kind of dated now and it's expected that better scenes will be produced by other directors.

I was amazed at the scenery, I usually become bored after the first 5 minutes when trying to create a scene, it must have taken old Jim hours to make them without them looking retarded.

Overall this film is a must for kill 'em' up fanatics and people who want to be wowed by the special effects. Mr. Pozin should be highly commended for such brilliance (scenes that is, as I said, the story line could have been better) and people should except other films and not latch on to AJ2 forever.

Good work Mr. Jim, hope to see more of this excellence you have produced. I give this film 4 1/2 out of 5 as it is by far the best action film I've seen since AJ2. (I don't mean to sound like a hypocrite for what I just said about latching on to AJ2 but it's the only good action film to compare it with).

Overall Verdict     

Hello, the world is a funny place to be
Directed by: BT
Movie type: COMEDY

Hello, the world is a funny place to be is actually not that funny at all. If I lived in this representation of the world I think I'd be pretty bored. Throughout the film we are shown various sketches of people getting run over, flying babies, people throwing safes, etc. The special effects in this film were not dazzling but were not crap, the part where the baby is going through the water slide was a pretty original idea but seemed to be a bit rushed and it could have been improved with a bit more effort. (don't think I'm preaching because I have made some well known films - I'm just stating a fact). Some of the jokes were quite predictable and lasted to long, like when those people kept getting squashed by the ambulances, the first few times were funny but the people were just waiting to be killed, also the animation through the entirety of the film was a bit jerky. The only bit I found funny was the part where that couple were sitting opposite each other at the table and the girl did this massive fart that's what I call comedy. (To the director: try to use more of this humour in your next film).

Half way through the film I wanted to turn it off because of the line 'And now for something completely different', it was used far to many times and didn't make the film any funnier by doing so.

Another thing that I found funny was the guy sneezing cars and various other unlikely objects out of his nose, I think that this was the only joke that wasn't used excessively. Also I think the choice of wavs in this film were good but were used to much. The sound quality was also of a good standard and were easy to understand unlike many films around nowadays, they were clear and easy to hear.

Overall, I think this film was an average comedy. The jokes were of a good standard but the director needs to expand the variety of the ones he included. e.g. People getting squashed all the time can get boring. I also need to stress the fact that the jokes were used to much, future comedians need to take that in to consideration. The directors humour was quite extrovert and by incorporating this in to his film should have made the film funnier than it actually was. I don't want this review to sound like one big moan about all the bad points and criticisms I have to make about this film because it does have some good points that I have stated above. I think my reviews are mis-understood, e.g. The Westside Vs Crypts review. Not many people could or wanted to understand my criticisms, I admit that I used a lot of profanity which may have offended people (not likely, the language used in the community nowadays is enough to frighten the pants of the corpes under your carpet) but I was frustrated at the fact that the film was so hyped up and resulted in a disappointing end result.

Anyway this film could have been better so I think the director should take my points in to account (or anyone else's views for that matter) when making his next comedy. I'd give this film a 3.

Overall Verdict    

Westside Vs. Crypts
Directed by: MOVIE BROTHERS (Ted Melot & Ghetto Munky 5)
Movie type: ACTION

Well, what can I say about this film ........not much really I was bored shitless throughout the whole thing, I was more bothered about when it would finish.

Firstly, the voices at the beginning were hard to understand, not that I was really bothered but it helps for viewing pleasure ...not that there was much. In one part of the film some guy was waving in the middle of the road, just letting this other guy run him over, as you can tell, I don't really know who I'm talking about, but this was because the directors didn't bother to give anyone names or didn't make it clear that they had names. The directors have obviously made a sloppy, badly thought out film. For this comment it may seem to you that I am judging him on his movie making skills by just one bad thing, but you will soon find out that there are many more bad mistakes to come.
The "Westside" gang showed how truly lame they actually were by getting some old guy to fight for them just because another guy saved his life 3 years ago (again, I apologize for my description of the characters, but it makes it very hard to tell who's who when some characters have been used about 3 times, Augustin kept cropping up all over the place). Also the Crypts had a big sign on their hideout saying who they were, so it was easy for the Westside gang to find them. Already you may be thinking "if this film is so crap, why did she watch it?" well it's all in the job of being a movie critic, but some of you actually enjoyed this film, such as JASON RUIZ who said "It's the MUTHA PHAT of all PHATNESS ...ITS HELLA COOL!!!!!!" (what the hell is MUTHA PHAT, us British dudes don't understand these American slang words).

Also the directors tried to sell the film by saying: "After almost a year in the making, Westside Vs Crypts is ready to tear in to the 3DMM community", "the movie of the summer" ..........well it tore into the 3DMM all right, and left a big hole full of unsatisfied customers! Also what a waste of a year!

Most people may have a stereotypical thought of what a tough gang should look like, big muscle men with guns and stuff like that, but this Westside gang looked like a geek patrol, a woman with a mask to hide her stench ridden face, a guy in a pink hat and some geek with glasses!!!
After the brilliant special effects in AJ 2 many people tried dismally to copy them. The effects were brilliant because he used variety of camera angles, like inside of a car, when it spinned around like it had been pushed of the road. He obviously put a lot of time in to them. AJ 2 was an action film, W Vs C wasn't, it's just a kill 'em up film, no story line just loosely related scenes of people getting killed. It's hard to copy Jason's effects without making them looking crap, that's what makes them special. Teddy's effects were just big explosions and a rubbish car chase which revolves around some guy getting his car blown up 4 times. My perception of an action film is tension, cliff-hangers, good car chases and relevant fights ......W Vs C had little to none of this.

I feel that I am wasting time telling you about shit so if you want to waste your own time watching this waste of space that's your choice. I hope you will take it in to consideration what I have just been saying when you make your choice. Also if you decide to make an action film yourself, make sure it is an action film and not a heap of festering junk that is a few trashy characters killing each other. I can't even call this a film, it's just a poor attempt to make one which has failed terribly.

I have nothing good to say about this film as the directors could have done much better if they had thought about what they were going to do and how they would structure their film.